A NEWFOUNDLAND LOVE POEM

Of course I loves ya darling

You're a bloody top notch bird

And when I say yer gorgeous

I means every single word

So yer arse is on the big side

I don't mind a bit of flab

It means that when I'm ready

There's somethin there to grab

So yer belly isn't flat no more

I tell ya, I don't care

So long as when I cuddle ya

I can get my arms round dere

I'm tellin ya the truth now

I never tells ya lies

I think its very sexy

Dat you've got dimples on yer thighs

I swear on me grannies grave

>From the moment that we met

I thought you was as good as

I was ever gonna get

No matter what you look like

I'll always love ya dear

Now shut up while the hockey's on

And get me a nudder beer.

.....Doesn’t it just bring a tear to the eye?

(And who said Newfoundlanders weren't romantic?)

Two Newfies in a Boat

Image via Wikipedia

 Newfoundland and Labrador

Two Newfies, Jarge and Eli, were adrift in a lifeboat. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, Jarge stumbled across an old lamp. He rubbed the lamp vigorously and a genie popped out. This genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three.

Jarge immediately blurted out, 'Turn the entire ocean into Molson Canadian beer.'

The genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the sea turned into beer and the genie vanished.

Only the gentle lapping of beer on the hull broke the stillness as the two men considered their circumstances.

Image by AshtonPal via Flickr

Molson Canadian Beer Logo

Eli looked disgustedly at Jarge whose wish had been granted. After a long, tension-filled moment Eli said, 'Nice going Jarge! ........Now we're going to have to piss in the boat.'

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